What's the big deal about Young Living

Dealing With Daily Uncertainty

Now that my husband has 2 part-time jobs, our financial burdens have been eased some. We are able to pay our bills and buy the very basic necessities for running a household of 10.

I still struggle with the uncertainty of day to day matters though, especially since he is working out of town most of the time now, and I am here with the kids on my own.

  • Will either of these jobs lead to a full time position?
  • When will he get to come home?
  • How often will he be called out of town?
  • Should I take the baby to the doctor for her fever? (He always knows what to do.)
  • How many more trips will his 1997 truck make?
  • How am I going to get the garbage to the dump? (He always takes it.)
  • Should we sign the kids up for gymnastics again?
  • What if one or both jobs fall through?
  • How do I answer, "What is Daddy's job? What does he do?"
  • Am I being too hard on the kids?
  • Am I being too easy on the kids?

It seems this layoff has made me second guess everything I thought I knew for sure.

  • I thought my husband getting up and going to work every morning was a sure thing.
  • I thought my husband being home for dinner every night was a sure thing.
  • I thought being careful with money meant getting the bills paid was a sure thing.

Now there aren't very many things I'm sure of at all.

I'm sorry there is no wise or witty ending to this post. I'm certain that at one time I would have had one, but I'm not sure I know what the take-away should be anymore.

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  1. Thank you for this, Connie. Our health insurance ended yesterday and my husband has only had 1 response for an interview since he was laid off. He hasn’t found part-time work to fill the gap in our budget each week, which I thought wouldn’t be hard. I know God will carry us through. The end will be good. But this is really hard. I wonder why He trusts me with this situation when I feel so inadequate. Thanks for letting me share.

  2. You are doing great with what God has blessed you with. Don’t worry and don’t fear…”For I am with you always”.

    It sounds like you have a wonderful church family and I am sure that making known requests such as trash…you will find someone to help.

    Be strong and courageous.

  3. I think not knowing the answers is a good place to be. While we are, in actuality, totally dependent on God, we often forget it. Unemployment, health issues, rebellious kid problems, relationship problems, etc. are stark reminders that only the Lord has all that we need, and it is to Him that we go, because He is, ultimately, the only place to run.

    I have been praying for your family. Michelle, I will add you to my prayer list.

  4. Stephanie says:

    I have appreciated the humor you have brought to the situation of surviving a layoff, but as one in the same predicament, I know that it is not funny. I use humor when talking about unemployment, too. Part of the reason is if I didn’t I would be very tempted to cry. When my husband lost his job in the spring, I suddenly had a newborn and a 22 month old and no health insurance. I knew through the love of friends and family we would never be cold, homeless, or hungry — but how were we going to afford doctors appointments? About that time both boys became sick with head colds. It was the longest two weeks of my life as I debated taking them to the doctor or not. In the end they were fine, but it is a horrible feeling to think I could not provide what the might have needed. Now we are in the process of downsizing and selling our house. Once again I have having to wait and see. Through it all I know the Lord has not changed in his faithfulness and grace. I also know that He allows things like this to knock off those things that are not pleasing to Him. I also know that it makes for hard days and restless nights. I am praying for all our families that the Lord will give us the grace to live each day faithfully in the trenches.


    Rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn.

    • Wow, Stephanie, your email is such a testament to your faithfulness and love for God. As a nurse and Mom, your stuggle with sick little ones just breaks my heart. I know there are other families in my practice that are in the same situation but that don’t have your love of the Lord. I will pray for your and Connie’s families…for health and peace. God bless you!

      • Stephanie says:

        Thank you Ann. We have been recently blessed to able to get coverage for our boys. It was definitely a praise the Lord moment. We were able to get both caught up on checkups.

  5. You said it all, in a previous post of yours…….God provides for his people. He hasn’t let me down yet and I know He will continue to guide you and give you strength. You are doing a wonderful job. Believe in yourself and your abilities as God believes in you. Give Him all the praise and glory even in the down times. Don’t let the enemy have even a sliver of a crack to come into your mind to think negatively…:..The same God on the mountains, is the same God in the valley !!!!

  6. Roni Nix says:


    I have so enjoyed reading your posts. I confess that I personally don’t deal well with the twists life throws at me.

    My husband has been/was an electrical contractor for 10 years. He was recently bought out and went to work for that company. They have sent him to Minot, ND to open a shop for them. I have read that your husband is up here in ND in the oil fields. I’m guessing he’s in the Williston/Minot area. Minot is approximately two hours from Williston. My husband is able to come home on weekends and he has asked me to let you know that your husband has an open invitation to come to our home for some time away from the field. He leaves Minot between 12 and 6 on Friday and returns Monday morning. We live about 4 hours from Minot.

    We are a home school family of five. We have three boys, ages 13, 10, and 2. Our girls are 11 and 6. We attend First Assembly of God in Fargo, ND and coordinate the Bible Quiz program there. We use Bob Jones home school curriculum. Our children love that the catechism that is referred to in their school corresponds to several of our quiz questions.

    Joel can be reached at 218-790-0283. He knows your husband as, Mr. Smockity. So, if your husband calls he will need to explain who he is.

    I pray God’s peace on your home too as you deal with the what I call “temporary single parenthood.” This life, which I didn’t sign up for, sure causes me to have more empathy on our military families and those who are living single parenthood for personal reasons. I’m sure that you are experiencing similar thoughts.

    May your day be blessed,

    Roni Nix

    • Smockity Frocks says:

      Thank you, Roni! I will let him know. I think he was in Bismark(?) yesterday and I’m not sure where in ND he will be the rest of the week. I will pass this info on to him.

  7. Our take-away is the learning to live totally dependent on God asking Him for wisdom. One of the hardest lessons to learn because you actually have to do it to learn it. Oh and don’t worry about tomorrow today [ie the truck]. The truth is we all live with uncertainty, we just don’t realize the things we thought were certain really aren’t for us or anyone else.

  8. I hope that sharing all this is a help to you personally – I’m sure it helps many others as well.
    I just wanted to say that while I understand your feeling of general insecurity after the shock of finding yourselves unemployed, try to trust in your instincts. It makes me sad to read that you’re second guessing your own abilities to cope with your children and the household duties. I know you can do it. I’m sure you’re doing a beautiful job with those children. We all just do the best we can as mothers, but if it’s a choice made from love it’s never ‘wrong’. I’m sure the trash will get to the dump one way or another. I’m sure the kids understand that even mama can have a bad moment. Trust yourself – you’re doing a wonderful job!

  9. I enjoyed this post. It reminds me that… Isn’t that sometimes the way it’s supposed to be? That God sometimes has a way of reminding us that we are not the ones with the answers?
    I’m still praying for you daily.

  10. Hugs, Connie! :)

  11. Just wanted to say that I am praying for you and that I know those feelings of uncertainty. My husband is in the Air Force. In Jan., we came from Spain to TX so that I could have our baby with a midwife. He was able to come be with us for a month when the baby was born. Our baby was born with club feet, so I had to stay here in TX for the treatment while my husband returned to Spain. The AF is moving him back to the states, but we don’t know when or where we will be moving. Our baby is now 4 months old and my husband hasn’t seen him since he was 2 weeks old.

    I know that the Lord has a plan, and it is a good plan, the waiting and living in the moment is just so hard. You feel like you are in survival mode, but then you realize that this is the new normal and life has to go on. It’s this kind of tough stuff that makes us stronger. It is also why the Lord chose you to be an example to other women out there, because you are strong enough to handle it (by His grace).

    May the Lord greatly bless you!

  12. Connie,
    I am not surviving a layoff, but I am having to survive a wayward child. My first born has left home, and has chosen to live a life different from the way he was raised. He does call but I have not seen my first born in 12 days.
    I was reminded sunday at church, God does not change, He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He is the same Jehovoa in your life now too. I know sometimes we have to get our hurts out, but I do want to remind you He is the same. I continue to pray for you.

    Serving a Mighty King,

  13. Hello friends and family,

    A dear friend of mine came across your blog and passed it along to me as encouragement. I have been reading your blog religiously for about 1 week, and I can’t get enough. It has faciliated the motivation and energy I have needed to get through each day. See, I had a great job until God called me out of it and told me I am to be a stay at home wife and make music my job. I was amped about it and so was my husband, that is until we found out that his job contract was going to end at the end of July. Oh, and yes..we found out that we are expecting our first child…we are newlyweds as of June 18th! Throughout all of this, we are trusting in God’s provisions. And daily reading the Bible has helped ease my fears, but still why is it so hard to trust a God that is so big?

    God has blessed us with a job for about 1 week and a half, just enough to pay for our rent. I know he is our DAILY bread and he doesn’t promise us a surplus, in fact he doesn’t want us to have that because he wants us to be 100% reliant upon him.

    So, Smockity – I appreciate this very raw and real post, a contrast from your others. Keep up the blog and know that you are greatly being used by God to touch and encourage others!

    Love in Christ,
    Mrs. Paris

  14. Connie,
    In the scope of things, and I mean this in the kindest of all ways, your problems are not that bad. Gymnastics, daddy’s job, or taking out the garbage? I know you don’t want to hear it but do you have any idea how horrific your lives would be if your husband did not have those two jobs? Regardless of whether you and he are living a pre-conformed ‘normal’ lifestyle. Who said that hubby/daddy has to be home at night or with you in the morning?

    You tell your kids (and you) that daddy’s job is to love all of you and take care of you. And whatever that is, he is doing what it takes. I had to raise my children alone also while my husband was out traveling all over the world. I kept my mouth shut and took care of every single thing. Because I knew the horror that would be waiting for us should daddy not be working.

    I know we all like to complain. And I’m the queen of complaints. People are always telling me to be grateful for what I have. But I don’t find contentment with other people’s misery. It is what it is. This is a battle. This is survival.

    Do not worry about the truck, or the two jobs. When we trust in God, He provides every single thing that we will need. It may not be ideal, but if you have a comfy bed to sleep in at night, a roof over your head, three hot meals a day, a hot shower every night, you are surely blessed.

    When I lost my car, the very next day, a friend gave me his pick up truck. For free. Do not be worried. God takes care of everything.

    Keep up the good fight.

    • Heather Mason says:

      Connie’s not one to whine. But her life has changed dramatically, and that is hard. She’s “just sayin'” as she likes to say. She’s always one to look on the bright side, but this is a hard season for her. No way around it.

      • I have to agree with Morrison to be honest here. We have to learn through the challenges God allows in our life – they are with us for a reason and we all have them. Not to minimize losing one’s job at all – but there is always something more difficult to go through. Thankfully her husband has some employment after being unemployed a few months. Many do not even have that in this economy. It is not easy to lose comfort and what we know, yet it is better to try to embrace such things than to fight them if we truly have faith and really believe that God is in control.

        I don’t think there’s a need to stick up for Connie as she could do that herself. There is nothing wrong with speaking the truth in love, and I believe Morrison was doing that.

    • Smockity Frocks says:

      Thank you, Morrison, for the encouragement. I know my situation could be so much worse. I’m just tired this week. That’s all.

      (It’s not a matter of taking the garbage out. It’s that it is piling up outside my garage with no way for me to get it to the dump – we don’t have trash service – and the coyotes are tearing into it.)

  15. I’ve been through a similar situation – only one child at that time, but I had to look at her sweet face and wonder how I would feed her (since my milk was no longer enough – she wanted her solids) clothe her, keep her warm… all while my ex worked long hours at a job that wasn’t making ends meet. I used cloth diapers (washed by hand, since we couldn’t always afford the laundromat), sewed clothes, cooked the cheapest food I could, and lost sleep every night as I tried to think of a way out of the jam we were in.
    After several years, I am now married to a wonderful man and we are, if not well-off, at least stable. But I never forget for a minute how it felt to be scared and desperate – and I think that’s the way God wants it. Having lived through a situation like that helps me be more understanding to other people who are going through trials like this and to reach out in support and love.
    Maybe God is using this situation to open your minds and hearts (your whole family included) to new ways of loving your neighbor in their times of need… and allowing your neighbors to love you in yours! It’s a humbling experience to receive gifts of food or gas cards, and even more humbling to feel so incredibly grateful for everything. I know. I wish I could offer more help like that right now, but I know I can offer my prayers for you.
    God bless!

  16. Oh, that is so hard. It’s all so hard! The unknown is also the hardest thing for me. We have a lot going on too (includng lack of job and maybe adopting a child) and as I wrote on my blog today I just felt drained. I feel like I have nothing left to offer, but then I remembered that I have hope in God! He can carry my burdens…


  17. One thing is always certain, God is not shocked nor is he dismayed. He is not pacing His throne room mumbling, “What are we going to do now? How are they going to make it through?” He is not sitting with his head in His hands, muttering to himself, “I just did not see this coming.”

    I would encourage you to plant a tree. In the Old Testament, they built altars to remember when God moved. Plant a tree knowing that God has provided jobs for your husband and that your physical needs are being met. Then, as you watch the tree grow, you can know that God is also growing your family through this situation. Years from now, when the tree is older and your faith is strengthened, you will be able to look back and see how God worked and look at the tree, realizing that what was once weak is now stronger.

    God will bring you through every question and doubt. Praying for you.

    • I like this idea! When I was grieving the loss of my young brother almost 9 years ago, a friend gave me an Amaryllis bulb in a pot. Every time it bloomed, it gave me hope and reminded me of how far we had come. After the winter, there is the spring. After the death, there is new life. The earth declares the glorious story of the resurrection, and the great Hope that we have in Christ. :)

    • A friend of mine is a missionary to China, and he collects stones from all his travels. He has a place where he puts them in his backyard as a reminder, an Ebenezer. It means “Stone of Help.” When he looks at it, he remembers all the ways and places God has brought him through, and will do so again. “Here I raise mine Ebenezer, hither by thy help I’ve come.” :)

  18. Hi Connie,
    I’ve truly enjoyed your blog and I am grateful for all of your tips and for your honesty in this situation.
    I, like most others responding have had very tough times like yours as well. Many years of my husband being unemployed and under-employed. Never knowing when or if bills would get paid. Not having a car or health insurance. Times of extra employment where we had money to survive but never saw my husband (except Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights-isn’t the enemy crafty?!) There is no sugar coating it, it is hard! Even with what you thought was strong faith, it is hard! It is scary, especially when it comes to our vulnerability as mothers.
    We are still in difficult times (back to under-employment) and with the economy as it is, I don’t know that we’ll ever return to what we once considered “normal” life. Now, I am not sure I want to!
    Through it all though, God has blessed us immeasurably, but not always in material ways. The biggest blessing was my husband’s salvation! Obviously I wouldn’t trade that for all the money and security in the world. He has also taught me (grown me, stretched me, broke me) in so many great ways I couldn’t list them all. For me, TRUE reliance on Him came only through sheer desperation and even then, I needed occasional reminders to keep me on track.
    But through it all, I now have the blessing of genuine thankfulness. Thankfulness for things that most of us in this country take for granted. Thankful for my husband being home with us even though it means no pay that day. Thankful for some work to catch us up even though it means not seeing husband much. Thankful for the chance to be home spending time with my children (instead of running around spending money).
    Ultimately, we all have our unique journey to take and lessons to learn. That is why God told us to mourn with those that mourn and rejoice with those that rejoice. That you are able to tell the truth about your fears and insecurities is a good thing, it helps those who feel the same way (like me) to know that despite our faith, we are still human. To have the contentment of Paul, in any situation, is a wonderful goal for us all. To have others come along side us on the journey to reach that goal, is more wonderful still.

  19. Connie – I have been reading here for quite a while, since the 4 moms series started. But I never comment.

    I just wanted to comment today to let you know that I have been praying for you and your family.

  20. Connie…(())

    I know. It’s hard. It’s really hard. (())

    You know, the very best thing someone told me when I was going thru the toughest time last year was this:

    “You’ll make it. You’ll do it. You’ll get through, because you have to.”

    I was lying on a table, and she was doing an ultrasound on me for a high risk pregnancy. My husband was in the hospital for his second staph infection and surgery in two months. I was wondering how on earth I was going to handle both of my elderly parents when they had joint replacement surgeries – one the next month and the next three weeks after that and the baby was due three weeks after that. I could scarcely breathe thinking about taking care of THREE people using walkers or wheelchairs, their needs, both homes, 8 children and a newborn. HOW?

    And she simply said…”You can do it.”

    Now, I knew that would only happen with the Lord’s help, of course.

    But….with Him, I would do it. I had to do it, and I could.

    You can too. You are a strong woman with a strong family and a stronger JESUS!


    Continuing to pray for you –


    • Heather Mason says:

      Yes, Holly! You can look back with wonder and see how God did it. Connie, you will look back too! “And we know that God causes all things to work together for GOOD for those who love God, for those who are called according to His purpose”. That’s you!

      You will do it! God will be faithful!

  21. I can absolutely sympathize!

    From personal experience, I can testify to the fact that when God brings you to your lowest point, He is getting ready to show off in a huge way.

    He delights in showing off His power to His children, if for nothing else than to remind them that He is in control and will always provide.

    But I also understand that you are human like the rest of us and are prone to “what if” thoughts. (As a chronic “what if”er myself, I can feel your pain!)

    I’ve commented a couple of times on other posts on your blog, but I truly feel your grieved heart in this one. I am so sorry that you are going through a time like this.

    I can’t wait to see how God shows off in your life, though!
    Will you please keep us updated?

    PS – If I lived anywhere near you I would totally take your trash to the dump for you! :-)

    I will be praying for you!

    – Liz

  22. Heather Mason says:

    I love the way that you continued to open your home for hospitality even during this tough time- Kim (“Life in a Shoe”) and a little girl (for a whole week!) and the Lockwoods. . . you are continuing to do the right things, being positive for your husband, making fun for your children (things like homemade duck ponds and homegrown watermelon) and doing what you can to contribute to your income.

    Go, Connie ! God is thinking “well done, good and faithful servant!” Keep it up!

  23. I have been reading your layoff posts since the beginning. I’m sure your life has been challenging during this time. In kindness though, I wonder how difficult of a life you have lived as it doesn’t seem you have had a life of many challenges (if this is the hardest thing you have had to endure). Like Morrison shared, I too believe if you have all the blessings that I believe you do have, the love of a husband who is doing all that he can, and wonderful children, then surely your life is not that devastating right now. Challenging, yes, but still very blessed.

    It’s really easy to be thankful when life is good, isn’t it? But when life is a little harder, we have to remember our blessings and to be thankful for all that we do have. I also find when life is not easy then it’s a good time to reach outside of my own problems and to be a blessing to someone else. It doesn’t have to cost money to do so. But it will take your mind off of your problems and it will help someone else. It’s a good lesson for the children too.

    Some of the stories I have read in your comments have been so humbling, and yet I have been encouraged by the faith in their hearts as well.

    It is better to be where you are right now than to be a single mom, a military wife with a husband at war, a widow, homeless, chronically ill. I could go on.

    Personally I have had a very difficult life. I do not have any living children which speaks for itself to say. When I see your life, I see a life that is full and blessed. Do not stay in this mindset – you need to say what you feel, and move through it. There will be much harder things in life to endure as we all age. This is a time for your faith to be strengthened and for your resolve to be strong because I guarantee this will not be the hardest thing you will ever have to endure.

    • Smockity Frocks says:

      Thank you, Lyn.

      I’m sorry this post sounded whiny. I realize I could have much bigger problems, and I wasn’t even trying to say that this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.

      I grew up with a deaf sister. My father was killed in an accident. I have had 2 miscarriages. So, no, this is not the worst thing.

      You are right. I am very blessed, and I do know that. I was just typing out my thoughts, which happen to be very tired thoughts this week.

      Thank you for reminding me of my blessings.

      • Connie, thank you for sharing back a bit. It’s nice to hear your thoughts in the comments.

        Challenges in life are a bit of perspective I think. There is always bad, really bad, and the worst that could happen. I think just looking from the outside into a bit of your life, yours seems blessed in the ways I shared.

        I am very sorry to hear of the losses you have had in your life. I have had several losses of children, including the loss of my only living child. This has been the most devastating loss in my life. I am older now, and have had health issues for many years. My life is not as I had hoped and planned, but it is the life God allowed for me, and daily I persevere.

        God will get you through this. Thank you for being honest about sounding a bit whiny. Although you didn’t mean to, I think that might be the way the post came across somewhat.

        • Just another thought – kind of like what Morrison is sharing below…could you maybe get some time for yourself a bit? If weariness and fatigue are getting to you, then maybe you need to have a little break to get refreshed so you can continue to be giving to your family. It’s hard to keep giving when we, ourselves are running a bit low. Moms, wives, and women in general give so much to others that we often forget to tend to ourselves too.

    • You know what? There is a ton worse that she could be going through right now. I’ve yet to see her deny that, or try to claim that hers is the worst situation. She is talking about her own struggles with what is a very, very difficult situation. I don’t get why people like you and Morrison need to try to knock her down a peg for that. That isn’t speaking the truth in love.

      Nobody needs to get into a whose trouble is worse kind of match, but that is exactly what you are setting her up for, which is really uncalled for. There are other ways to remind people of their blessings than to tell them how they really don’t have it so hard in what _is _ a hard thing for a family of 10 to deal with for any length of time.

      I had a son who needed surgery the day after his birth and who was in the NICU for eight days. It wouldn’t have been helpful for someone who didn’t even know me to come and tell me how I should be grateful he was alive and that he got out so early so to quit my complaining when I was sharing the difficulties of dealing with my situation.

      Sure, her husband could be dead or at war, she might have lost all of her children, they could have lost their home, there could have been a house fire (as happened to a friend of mine recently). There is a lot worse that could come upon them. That doesn’t make this any easier. Not knowing how you will feed your eight children is hard. Wondering if you can make the mortgage payment is hard. Being away from your husband/father for a long time is hard. Wondering if the car will make it so he can come back is hard. Trying to pay for a repair or replacement when you are already in a bad place financially is hard. And, yes, wondering if you can provide the activities that bring your children pleasure or not is hard. It isn’t necessary to take gymnastics, no, but having to take it from your children because you cannot provide it is a hard thing to do and painful.

      I have never read her whining or complaining. This didn’t strike me as a whining post. She has never said she has it the worst of all. Or even worse than most. Just that they have had something cataclysmic happen that is hard to deal with, a struggle to go through, that they are trying to do with grace. It is heartless to suggest that she is doing so because she does not know difficulty or pain.

  24. Ask God to send someone to you to help out with the trash. Perhaps a neighbor or relative can help? Or a teenager? Someone will appear.

    And if you are feeling tired, ask God to give you a pleasant day off. Or a few hours.

    Pray and watch the miracles.

  25. I am writing (again) after reading a couple of the comments above. I have read your blog (off and on, but more regularly now that you’ve begun posting about your husband’s layoff), but haven’t commented before a couple of days ago.

    I think that, perhaps (since I don’t know you, I can’t be absolutely certain), you were misunderstood in your post. When I read it, I read it straight, i.e., that you were just putting it out there, and that you weren’t complaining, but just being honest. I didn’t read it as though you were ungrateful, or whining when you wondered (aloud–but on “paper,” er, blog post) if you should sign your kids up for gymnastics. I read it as though you were merely stating the thought processes that your mind goes through now that your husband is gone away from the home on business.

    This is the very reason that I shut down a short-lived blog that I wrote for a couple of months a couple of years ago. It wasn’t worth it (to me, anyway) to take it on the chin, be misunderstood and have hurt feelings. I give you credit for having more courage than I had/have. I appreciate your thoughts and honesty w/regard to how you’re coping through this time. I have enjoyed reading about it, and it is an encouragement.

    And, I know that, ulimately, you’re depending on God–but that doesn’t come w/out pain and trials. UGH.

  26. I read your post last night. I understand the husband being gone part because about 10 years ago, my husband had a job that kept him away for crazy-long days for months on end. The kids and I would see him before he went to work and then maybe not until 8, 9, 10, 12, or later that night. We had just had a baby and I was taking care of him plus my other children all alone. I knew my life wasn’t as hard as a single mom’s life, because at least I had a husband, and a pay check coming in (that I didn’t have to go earn). But I felt so alone, bored, overwhelmed and helpless sometimes. When he did finally get home, he was so tired (understandably so) that he couldn’t help with the children through the night hours.

    I had to come to a place of accepting that this was all my thing (everything related to the house and children) and I wouldn’t have his help for an unknown amount of time. I had to believe God could make me able to shoulder what really did feel like it was TOO MUCH.

    Years later, my husband worked from home. I got to see him a lot, but we made almost nothing. I would take stock of the pantry and mentally calculate, “Ok, we can eat for 2 more days, then we have no more food. Our toilet paper will last for a few more days.” Etc. You get the idea. We experienced God’s provision much like you are – through friends, family and neighbors giving and helping. It was so hard to be on the receiving end of giving instead of the giving end! My husband felt so scared and defeated! His best efforts were not enough to provide for his family. And we had another kiddo on the way! He kept sending resumes and hoping for something to open up. Until it did, we prayed for everything we needed, and we never ever missed a meal. God was so faithful. And God finally opened up a new opportunity for my husband.

    I know you feel tired, and you are full of questions. This is real, and really hard. Even if this isn’t the hardest thing you’ll ever face, or as hard as someone else’s trials, it’s still hard. I would recommend keeping your spending bare bones, meaning, probably no gymnastics right now. Pray for everything you need. Ask God for creative solutions and ideas that will bring a sparkle to the mundane sameness of daily living. God’s sparkly ideas are often free or very doable using things we already have. (For example, during our “low-income” time, we redid our daughter’s room as a birthday present. We spray-painted some decorative items, painted her walls with free paint that was given to us, and put a new clearance-rack comforter on her bed. The room was amazing. And it cost only as much as that one cheap comforter. Getting the paint for free was an answer to prayer. We got many cans and after mixing 2-3 colors, got the perfect shade to match the comforter.) And don’t begrudge yourself the chance for a good cry. Letting your kids see your real emotions, hear your fervent prayers, and watch God come through will change them for the better. Forever. Our kids still remember the faithfulness of God in that season.

  27. Connie…if there’s any comfort, take heart knowing you guys are one of many in this. We’re in the same boat. Less kids, but same type of thing. I struggle over do I buy curriculum or just “wing it” (thankfully we’re Charlotte Mason style schoolers so I only need good books!)…do the kids get to go to baseball again? Can we afford to eat out with the family in August when we go on vacation with my Dad? Do I feel guilty that he’s paying for our trip? So much to ponder. You’re not alone.

  28. Thank you for continuing this series! The last year has been fraught with uncertainty for us too as we go through the same thoughts and feelings. Even now as we look at new jobs, we have to make sacrifices…moving a long distance, making very little, or going back to school. I wish the ideal job would come along, but it hasn’t yet. For now, we can only try our best with the choices we have, and trust God to work through it all somehow. I hope you are also able to find your dream job, even if you have to try some other things for now. :) It helps me to remember that God worked through a lot of people in the Bible, who weren’t doing their dream jobs either, and somehow he always provided for them too. Hang it there! Jeremiah 29:11 :)